Home Sweet Home

Thursday night I flew back to Virginia and I feel like I'm slipping back into my own skin.  The plane landed and I immediately felt happy.  Happy.  This is what happy feels like.  The air is muggy and wonderful.  I can wear a sundress from morning 'til midnight.  I'm in the same timezone as the majority of my friends.  Yesterday morning, my dad and I got beignets for breakfast.  After he headed into the office, I walked up to Barnes and Noble and considered buying a jigsaw puzzle.  Who is this new, happy, stress-free person that cropped up after landing in Virginia? 

Then, last night, after a delicious lemon-drop martini in the city with my parents, I got to see Mike J.!!!!  And I got to meet his girlfriend, Kelsey!  She's fantastic!  And his law school friends!  It was just the homecoming I wanted/needed.  My favorite part was walking into Pinkberry and Davia's eyes growing wide and her saying, "Mike!  You didn't tell us Absi would be here!  Oh my God!  (she runs to envelope me in a hug)  You don't know me but I'm Davia!!!"  Mike apparently didn't even tell Kelsey that they were meeting me, so I was just a giant surprise for everyone.  It was fun.  They are all wonderful people.  I hope I get to spend lots more time with them in the future. 

Soon, Williamsburg.  And a visit with Megan.  Ahhh, Virginia.  I love this place.

The Strawberry Alarm

I decided that I didn't want to bother cooking last night, but I didn't really want to go out anywhere either.  I was in pajama pants and I had resolved to order a pizza from a large national chain which delivers to my address, but on a whim I went to the website for Flying Squirrel Pizza, my favorite pizza place in Seattle (which does not deliver to my address).  What I saw on that website broke my resolve.  What I saw on that website made me put on real clothes, get in my car, and go get that pizza.



The Strawberry Alarm.  A seasonal special with-- get this-- fresh strawberries, goat cheese, mozzarella cheese, tomato sauce (with, I think, crushed red pepper in it), salumi coppa, and chopped walnuts.  The site describes it as "sweet, spicy, and incredible."  I could not agree more.  The site also alludes to this becoming a year round classic pizza, and I so hope it goes on the regular menu because, baby, I would put on jeans and drive for this pizza any day.  This is no pizza but a masterpiece.  Well done, Flying Squirrel, well done. 

(And no, this is not a sponsored post.  I just really love pizza, particularly from Flying Squirrel)

More to do than can ever be done

Yesterday I had a mild panic attack in Half-Price Books.  I went to see if they had any introductory Latin books, as one of my friends had told me she loved learning Latin and I think if I continue down the Early Modern road it would be very useful to know Latin.  So, yeah, I get there and they DO have the Latin books I was looking for!  Both of them!  At half price (go figure)!

But they also had an Italian textbook.  And several programs to learn Polish (which I'm jonsing to learn right now, as my grandpa was Polish and I want to know more about my heritage on that side of the family).  Then they had books to learn French-- which I should really brush up on-- and a Russian program.  I had so much fun in Russian House as an undergrad, drinking tea and hanging out with my friends who actually took Russian, and I thought, "That could be fun to learn."  Then I have my Sanskrit book sitting here at home, taunting me.

I decided to go upstairs to see what other books were available.  The collected novels of Jane Austen, a bunch of stuff by Paolo Coelho, The Canterbury Tales, books and books on folklore from all over the world.  An entire section of history books, including things by some of my favorite authors.  Several books I've always wanted to read, but haven't.  Then I remember all the books I have here at home-- novels, memoirs, library books-- that I have yet to read.  Books I want to reread.  Books, books, books.  And looking at all of the collected knowledge in that bookshop I sat down in the very back corner (the history section) and took a few deep breaths to collect myself.

Then I took the Italian textbook and put it back, because there was really no way I was going to study Latin AND Italian.  I'll be lucky if I actually crack open the Latin books, probably.

I guess the point is, I'm trying to remind myself that while book-learning is all well and good, I'm not wasting my time if I'm not reading a book.  It's ok to go out to dinner with friends and have a few glasses of wine and not get home until 10:00, even if it means a whole evening spent not reading.  It's ok to sit outside on my porch with a glass of lemonade and just enjoy the feel of the sun on my face-- we so rarely get sun that I SHOULD enjoy it.  It's ok to go shopping all morning with one of my friends that I rarely see: human interaction-- and even a bit of idleness-- is a necessary part of life.  Book-learning should not interfere with my friendships.

I'm not sure when I got so obsessed with needing to be reading/studying all the time.  I think I've forgotten how to relax.  Or, since I don't have to be reading all the time during the summer (as opposed to during the school year), I feel guilty "relaxing" because I feel like I haven't "earned" it-- I haven't written any papers, I haven't done any research, why should I feel entitled to a good meal and good company?  This is a problem, I think.  Especially since during the school year I rarely do any quality relaxing anyway.  I just never give myself a moment to breathe.  I'm even trying to do yoga with the determination of someone who wants to know it intellectually inside and out, instead of letting it be a calming routine to bring me closer to God and to myself.

I started thinking about that line in The Lion King song-- "From the day we arrive on the planet/ and blinking step into the sun/ there is more to see than can ever be seen/ more to do than can ever be done."  I remember when I was little I thought that was an exaggeration (like, when I was seven) and thought I WOULD read everything ever written, and see all the sights, and eat all the food, and everything.  I was incredibly naive. Yet, I think somewhere deep down I'm still trying to do that. And I need to let that go.  Life is about more than reading it all, seeing it all, eating it all in a frenzy of "must get this done."  That doesn't even sound fun. 

I think this all came up because I'm turning 25 this year.  I feel like I haven't done nearly enough for being on this planet for a quarter of a century, though I keep trying to remind myself that I've done my very best.

So, from now on, I'm going to try to enjoy things, to not panic that I don't know absolutely everything because how can I?  I want to enjoy learning again, instead of looking at it as a to-do list of books that I must finish before I can "relax."  Learning should be fun; in fact, it could be pleasurable and relaxing in and of itself.  If you all want to remind me of this from time to time, I'd appreciate it, because I'm sure another panic attack will happen sooner if not later.

Cross-Stitching

Right now I'm working on a very complex cross-stitch pattern.  The design itself is only 5x7 inches, so not massive, but literally every single space is filled with a crossed stitch.  No white space at all.  And there were FOUR bundles of different colored threads to parse through.  It's a Thomas Kinkade "Beauty and the Beast" design, but not the full huge one that no one in their right mind could finish, but the inset of Belle, Beast, the dog footstool, Mrs. Potts, Chip, and Cogsworth.  I'm sad the inset doesn't have Lumiere, but really, I was not going to attempt the huge one.  I've already worked for hours and hours on what I have and am no where near finished.  That's the bane and beauty of cross-stitch: it takes so long to make even the smallest pattern come together.  But I love watching figures emerge from the thread-- when you can spot the curve of an arm or the shape of a profile.  There's something about it that feels so productive and at the same time so calming.  Listening to Jane Eyre as I stitch has been a real treat, too.  Sometimes I wish that all I really had to do in life was listen to audiobooks and cross-stitch.  These have been beautiful hours.  

And it feels like I've never been gone...

Last week I spent a few days in Florida-- Captiva Island, to be specific.

I got off the plane and was instantly enveloped in warm, muggy air.  I haven't been so happy in ages.  Everyone says the best part of Seattle is no humidity on the few nice days we have.  While that's great and all, I grew up in the Midwest and the South.  I am no stranger to humidity.  Being able to wear a tank-top after dark, walking around comfortably in flip-flops from morning 'til night-- that's summer.

And does it get any better than days spent sitting on the beach, reading a good book and listening to the waves breaking on the seashells and sand?  Gathering beautiful shells and seeing living sand-dollars in the shallow water just off shore?  Spotting dolphins out in the Gulf?  Listening to thunderstorms after dark?  Enjoying the feel of air conditioning after a hot day in the sun?  Going for Bubble Bread and Smarvelous She-Crab Soup at the Bubble Room-- not to mention the orange crunch cake, rum runner, and Key Lime Colada?  Getting lobster tail, crabcakes, and fried clam strips at the Mucky Duck?  Watching the sunset on the ocean, with a margarita in hand?

Nope.  Nothing better.  That right there is my version of heaven.  Bring me that horizon.

These are the days

Everyone said summer started on the fourth of July (after saying it started in May, June, etc).  And they were right.  After weeks of rain and gloom, July 4th dawned bright and sunny.  The past two days I've sat on the balcony in the afternoon reading The Historian, reveling in the feel of sunshine.  I can wear short-sleeves finally.  I can go outside in flats or sandals instead of tennis shoes and boots.  The breeze that blows through the apartment is deliciously cool, instead of cold and damp.

This morning I trekked to Whole Foods for bits of watermelon and guacamole, and to get quarters for laundry and a lavender-scented fabric softener.  The fabric softener smells like the shops in Colonial Williamsburg, somehow floral and spicy at the same time.  Now I'm heating up some leftover chicken and rice for lunch, between periodically running to change laundry loads, and I think when the sun hits the balcony this afternoon I'll sit and read again, with a glass of raspberry lemonade.  Or maybe I'll cross-stitch with my Jane Eyre audiobook to keep me company.  Or perhaps indulge in a little Muzzy to improve my French.  Reading or cross-stitching or working on French-- the best choices in the world.  If this were my everyday, I'd be completely content.

Yesterday, too, was wonderful.  I woke up with an e-mail from one of my favorite academics-- she's, to me, a celebrity for her work on English theater.  I own most of her books and used several of them during my masters work and for my thesis, thus, I couldn't stop smiling because of this e-mail.  I felt overawed!  Then, my professor from last quarter helped me finagle a scheduling issue so I can take the textual studies class that I need to take!  I get to take it!  It felt like a sign from God that I'm meant to be in this program and that I'm on the right track for my career goals.  Finally!  :)

Fourth of July, W&M

Because it's the Fourth of July and I'm missing my alma mater.  Behold:  about to ratify the Declaration of Independence AND William and Mary Pride, all in one great, short video.  Go Tribe!  :)