Well folks, last blog post of 2010! I hate to judge a year before it's officially over (we still have 11 hours to go! A lot can happen!), but I've been thinking a lot about the past twelve months. To say that 2010 was a bad year is to deny its many blessings. I have fallen in love; I have gotten to know my sister-in-law and through her I am learning about the man my brother was; I have grown closer to many friends, reconnected with others, and have realized what wonderful friends I really do have-- they have been so incredibly supportive during this whole year; I realized how precious our health is, and am thankful for the relatively good health of myself, my family, and my friends. But I suppose that physics law-- about equal and opposite reactions-- holds true. To see and gain these blessings, I paid a price. I lost several people who I loved and who were close to me, through death and falling-outs. I nearly lost my dad, though we didn't realize how close it was at the time.
Still, the more I think about it, the more good I find in 2010. Of course, the bad things this year were really, really bad. I felt low and demoralized for most of the summer, and the spring was a chaos of emotions ranging from the highest of highs to low despair sometimes both conflicting within a single moment. But 2010 was also the year of my Shakespeare independent study, it's the year that I've (almost) completed a thesis, it's a year that I finished my coursework for my masters, that I got a 4.0 for my first semester ever, that I learned to paint with acrylics, that I moved into this wonderful house. The year I discovered Mumford and Sons and Laura Marling music, that I started watching DS9, that I helped out with the 48 hour film fest, that I laughed over silly things like Sesame Street and Bill Nye. The year of a wonderful amazing trip to Britain complete with three professional Shakespeare plays, a stay in a castle, archery, and the Doctor Who exhibit. The year where I got both Muzzy (in January) and Muzzy II (at Christmas), so that I can learn another language with a giant green alien. A year where, even just last night, I gave and received Christmas presents with new friends and old friends grown closer.
A year where I have had plenty to eat, lots of time to read, to think. I learned to trust my own instincts instead of listening to other people, to find out the truth for myself. I suppose, too, I learned to trust myself more completely than ever before, which is a big thing. I had time for me, but also time to let love blossom, and to let wounds heal. And really, that's a lot.
So, farewell 2010. Hope to see you all safe and happy in 2011.
Believe.
Friday, December 31, 2010
Friday, December 24, 2010
"Frog Leg Lunch": A Christmas Present for You All
Christmas Eve. I must have grown-up, because today no longer seems as interminably long as it did when I was a little girl, waiting for night-time and Santa Claus. Presents are nice, but I think part of growing up is realizing that material objects are just nice ornaments to the necessities of life. I appreciate them, of course, and will never turn down a present, but in the end all I need is food in my stomach, clothes on my back, a roof over my head, and the love of true friends. I have that, and I am content. In fact, I've come to realize that I like Christmas Eve more than Christmas itself. I love all of our traditions old and new-- tortilla soup for dinner, going to Christmas Eve service at St. Johns, and, most especially, watching Muppet Christmas Carol with my family.
Since the Muppets have always been a major part of my Christmas celebration, I decided to give you, my friends, an early Christmas 'gift.' Below is a paper I wrote when I was fourteen years old and a freshman in high school. For a bit of context, the paper was a handwritten project completed over two class periods-- and could only be written in class. Every freshman had to write on the prompt, "If you could have lunch with one figure-- fictional, historical, or living-- who would it be and why?" We had to give reasons and explain them in order to get a good grade. It's also helpful to know that I attended Jefferson City High School, but since there are so many students the freshman are taught in a building called Simonsen. Also, this was before the Swamp Days movie came out about the origins of a certain frog. None of the spelling or punctuation has been changed. And now, without further ado...
Since the Muppets have always been a major part of my Christmas celebration, I decided to give you, my friends, an early Christmas 'gift.' Below is a paper I wrote when I was fourteen years old and a freshman in high school. For a bit of context, the paper was a handwritten project completed over two class periods-- and could only be written in class. Every freshman had to write on the prompt, "If you could have lunch with one figure-- fictional, historical, or living-- who would it be and why?" We had to give reasons and explain them in order to get a good grade. It's also helpful to know that I attended Jefferson City High School, but since there are so many students the freshman are taught in a building called Simonsen. Also, this was before the Swamp Days movie came out about the origins of a certain frog. None of the spelling or punctuation has been changed. And now, without further ado...
------------
Simonsen City Tribune:
Frog Leg Lunch
Frog Leg Lunch
Hello Simonsen City readers'. Last week I informed you that I could have dinner with anyone: living, dead, historical, fictional, good, or evil. Thank you for all your suggestions, but I made my own choice.
To begin, I walked tentively into the dimly-lit Sardi's, a famous restaurant in New York and set for Muppets' Take Manhatten, to meet the one I had chosen to interview. I was led to a booth to wait. A few minutes later, an army of Kamakaze butterflies invaded my stomach as I heard a small, unique, unforgettable voice at the podium say, "Kermit the Frog here." I know you must be wondering why I would choose to have dinner with Kermit the Frog when I could have picked from any other figure known to man, nevertheless, I feel confident in my reasoning.
First, I decided to pick someone nearly everyone has heard about. Although nearly everyone has heard of Osama bin Laden, I decided to go for a more gentle approach. I wanted to have dinner with someone lovable. Kermit the Frog was just one among Mickey, Minnie, Elmer Fudd, and others. There was so much to consider!
Secondly, I wanted someone who was sophisticated and gifted in the arts. This cut out Ronald McDonald and the Easter Bunny. Kermit was still in the running. Still, there were so many choices.
Then, I wanted someone with a more closed personal life so I could learn new things about them. I wanted to be able to peel them like a mandarin orange. This eliminated Santa Claus, Mickey Mouse, and Minnie Mouse.
Next, I wanted someone who influenced me in a positive way. This took Elmer Fudd of my list. Kermit the Frog was now at the top of my list. Now I had to figure out how this frog encompassed these high standards.
First I needed to know how Kermit influenced me in a positive way. With all the movies he was the star of in mind, I reached to the far reaches of my brain, past the dustbunnies, then I realized the answer was right in front of my nose. Kermit was where I got my optimistic outlook on life. I rarely saw Kermit's face downcast or depressed. Kermit was the one who came up with radical ideas' that always ended well. As Kermit told of Tiny Tim being buried so he could always watch the ducks on the river in A Muppet Christmas Carol my heart soared to hear Dickens words come out of that frog's mouth in his unique "never-give-up" tone. When Kermit cries (which is hardly ever) I cry, but when Kermit smiles, I smile back. Kermit does have a positive influence on me.
Secondly, I needed to know how Kermit was sophisticated. I knew to answer to that almost immediately. Kermit the Frog was sophisticated because of all the movies' he'd been in. He must have read the novels before getting parts in A Muppet Christmas Carol and Muppet Treasure Island. Kermit knew how to solve crimes, take a road trip, and work in a restaurant in Manhatten. All these experiences lead to one very complex frog. This answer took care of the next question. Kermit was gifted in the arts because of all the movies he was in. He was a gifted actor and singer, take his heart-warming song "The Rainbow Connection."
Next, I had to question how much I knew about Kermit's personal life. Just as I suspected, the tabloids did not have reports on Kermit nearly as often as on other celebrities. Consequently, there were plenty of unanswered question about his life. Kermit's relationship with Miss Piggy is common knowledge, but just how deep did it go? Was their love a rainpuddle or a well? Would I have a celebrity engagement to report to my readers'? More importantly I wondered about Kermit's childhood. He obviously had siblings since he has a nephew named Robin. I pondered what their names were. I decided to ask Kermit how he got to be famous. It seemed strange that Kermit's siblings, who must be gigantic, talking frogs, blended into the woodwork.
Finally, I had to question my choice to see if he was in fact lovable. I concluded that he possessed lovable qualities shortly after picturing his avacado-green skin and his friendly, familiar voice. Most of all it was his good nature, the way he stayed with crabby Miss Piggy through it all, and his optimistic outlook on life that made Kermit the perfect dinner date.
To begin, I walked tentively into the dimly-lit Sardi's, a famous restaurant in New York and set for Muppets' Take Manhatten, to meet the one I had chosen to interview. I was led to a booth to wait. A few minutes later, an army of Kamakaze butterflies invaded my stomach as I heard a small, unique, unforgettable voice at the podium say, "Kermit the Frog here." I know you must be wondering why I would choose to have dinner with Kermit the Frog when I could have picked from any other figure known to man, nevertheless, I feel confident in my reasoning.
First, I decided to pick someone nearly everyone has heard about. Although nearly everyone has heard of Osama bin Laden, I decided to go for a more gentle approach. I wanted to have dinner with someone lovable. Kermit the Frog was just one among Mickey, Minnie, Elmer Fudd, and others. There was so much to consider!
Secondly, I wanted someone who was sophisticated and gifted in the arts. This cut out Ronald McDonald and the Easter Bunny. Kermit was still in the running. Still, there were so many choices.
Then, I wanted someone with a more closed personal life so I could learn new things about them. I wanted to be able to peel them like a mandarin orange. This eliminated Santa Claus, Mickey Mouse, and Minnie Mouse.
Next, I wanted someone who influenced me in a positive way. This took Elmer Fudd of my list. Kermit the Frog was now at the top of my list. Now I had to figure out how this frog encompassed these high standards.
First I needed to know how Kermit influenced me in a positive way. With all the movies he was the star of in mind, I reached to the far reaches of my brain, past the dustbunnies, then I realized the answer was right in front of my nose. Kermit was where I got my optimistic outlook on life. I rarely saw Kermit's face downcast or depressed. Kermit was the one who came up with radical ideas' that always ended well. As Kermit told of Tiny Tim being buried so he could always watch the ducks on the river in A Muppet Christmas Carol my heart soared to hear Dickens words come out of that frog's mouth in his unique "never-give-up" tone. When Kermit cries (which is hardly ever) I cry, but when Kermit smiles, I smile back. Kermit does have a positive influence on me.
Secondly, I needed to know how Kermit was sophisticated. I knew to answer to that almost immediately. Kermit the Frog was sophisticated because of all the movies' he'd been in. He must have read the novels before getting parts in A Muppet Christmas Carol and Muppet Treasure Island. Kermit knew how to solve crimes, take a road trip, and work in a restaurant in Manhatten. All these experiences lead to one very complex frog. This answer took care of the next question. Kermit was gifted in the arts because of all the movies he was in. He was a gifted actor and singer, take his heart-warming song "The Rainbow Connection."
Next, I had to question how much I knew about Kermit's personal life. Just as I suspected, the tabloids did not have reports on Kermit nearly as often as on other celebrities. Consequently, there were plenty of unanswered question about his life. Kermit's relationship with Miss Piggy is common knowledge, but just how deep did it go? Was their love a rainpuddle or a well? Would I have a celebrity engagement to report to my readers'? More importantly I wondered about Kermit's childhood. He obviously had siblings since he has a nephew named Robin. I pondered what their names were. I decided to ask Kermit how he got to be famous. It seemed strange that Kermit's siblings, who must be gigantic, talking frogs, blended into the woodwork.
Finally, I had to question my choice to see if he was in fact lovable. I concluded that he possessed lovable qualities shortly after picturing his avacado-green skin and his friendly, familiar voice. Most of all it was his good nature, the way he stayed with crabby Miss Piggy through it all, and his optimistic outlook on life that made Kermit the perfect dinner date.
-----------------
Merry Christmas everyone!
Merry Christmas everyone!
Thursday, December 23, 2010
Glad of What Keeps Me Afloat
The past week has been full of reconnections, and I feel so lucky to have the friends I do, even if I only see some of them once in a blue moon. My friends come from everywhere, but with Christmas cards and telephone calls and e-mails from afar, they remind me I am loved. With long conversations over hot chocolate or white wine, they expand my ideas of the possible. On Tuesday I caught up with Mr. Howarth, my favorite high school teacher, when he invited me to attend a Project Enlightenment meeting as a guest speaker (do I feel old! Speaking at a club meeting when not that long ago I was in the club!). Last night, as I sat with Carter in our usual pub, the Hawk and Dove, snug and warm with a fire in the fireplace, caught up in good conversation about Renaissance texts, Shakespeare, family, the 18th century, paper, Grizzle, and a million other things, I received-- quite unexpectedly-- text messages from three dear friends essentially just to say they were thinking of me. Returning home I found an e-mail telling me that I am loved by the best of men. Today I had lunch with a good friend from college, followed by a long, soul-reviving online conversation with one of my best friends. Two nights ago I read the Christmas chapter of Little House in the Big Woods, and tonight we will watch Mickey's Once Upon a Christmas. Our Christmas tree overflows with gifts, and our kitchen is full of food, and for these things I am so grateful.
Found this song today ("The Water" by Johnny Flynn, with my favorite singer/songwriter Laura Marling), thanks to my conversation with Carter, and I love it. Happy Christmas Knickumknackums, everyone!
Found this song today ("The Water" by Johnny Flynn, with my favorite singer/songwriter Laura Marling), thanks to my conversation with Carter, and I love it. Happy Christmas Knickumknackums, everyone!
Monday, December 20, 2010
Daydreams, Gingersnaps
My hands smell like cloves and cinnamon, and soon the house will, too. Gingersnap dough is cooling so we can roll it into little balls and dip them in sugar and bake them. Cookies were always my favorite part of Christmas, except with only three of us many cookies go to waste, so in recent years we've stopped making so many. But gingersnaps are always a favorite.
Yesterday found me in Staunton, then Charlottesville to hear the music of Zach Laliberte. He's a friend of Zan and Lys, and he had booked a gig at a wonderful little restaurant/bar called The Maya. Best mac and cheese ever, seriously. Also, fantastic ambiance and, with Zach there, amazing music. If you haven't already seen it, you should check out the music video Zan and Lys made of his song Daydream.
There are moments where everything seems perfectly at ease and all I can think and feel is happiness. The past two days have been full of such moments. Last night, listening to Zach play and sing in a room filled with people I knew or wanted to know, with the lights low, candles flickering on the exposed brick, a dry cider at hand-- I felt lulled finally into a calm which has eluded me the past few weeks. And after he finished playing we all talked of around the world-- India, China, South Africa-- things I want to see someday, and which seem so easy to make a reality, when someone else talks of them freely. Then home through the cold, and the moon bright on the snow in the drive; a house full of warm kittens (almost cats now) and chocolates and even more easy conversation.
And even today was filled with beyond-good moments; a morning of milky coffee with lots of sugar, a funny Youtube video, laughter and the most beautiful, perfect Christmas gift.
My heart has rarely felt so full as it has these past two days.
Yesterday found me in Staunton, then Charlottesville to hear the music of Zach Laliberte. He's a friend of Zan and Lys, and he had booked a gig at a wonderful little restaurant/bar called The Maya. Best mac and cheese ever, seriously. Also, fantastic ambiance and, with Zach there, amazing music. If you haven't already seen it, you should check out the music video Zan and Lys made of his song Daydream.
There are moments where everything seems perfectly at ease and all I can think and feel is happiness. The past two days have been full of such moments. Last night, listening to Zach play and sing in a room filled with people I knew or wanted to know, with the lights low, candles flickering on the exposed brick, a dry cider at hand-- I felt lulled finally into a calm which has eluded me the past few weeks. And after he finished playing we all talked of around the world-- India, China, South Africa-- things I want to see someday, and which seem so easy to make a reality, when someone else talks of them freely. Then home through the cold, and the moon bright on the snow in the drive; a house full of warm kittens (almost cats now) and chocolates and even more easy conversation.
And even today was filled with beyond-good moments; a morning of milky coffee with lots of sugar, a funny Youtube video, laughter and the most beautiful, perfect Christmas gift.
My heart has rarely felt so full as it has these past two days.
Saturday, December 18, 2010
How This Grace Thing Works
A Christmas tree! The one thing my little home in Williamsburg lacks-- abundantly here at my parent's house! No one else was home when I arrived, but the Christmas tree stood proudly in the family room, already lit and garlanded with the angel on top. No presents under it, though, so I put one under the tree to make it look more festive.
Last night was tree decorating night. With A Charlie Brown Christmas in the background and Sphinx asleep under the tree, we dragged out boxes and boxes of ornaments, all collected over many years. The finished product is eclectic; our tree has never been one of the perfect ones, with matching glass baubles and gold finishes. Instead it has everything from a paper hand-drawn creche scene ornament I made when I was five (you can imagine how classy that looks- ha!) to cross-stitched Santas to expensive glass balls and everything in-between.
After the tree is done, Christmas music goes on and I put up the Nativity scene. It's the most important task for me every year. I love unwrapping each figure: the three wise-men, with their gifts and their three camels; the shepherds in the fields by night, and the sheep they keep watch over, and even the drummer boy; the beautiful angel, who looks over all of them. But my favorite pieces are Joseph, the Virgin Mary, and, of course, the baby Jesus. I feel so reverent as I place them in the barn, with the cow who gave up her manger, and the donkey who carried Mary to Bethlehem. Those pieces glow with a special light.
I love all of the trappings of Christmas, presents and cards, holly boughs and mistletoe, candles and cookies-- but I love most of all remembering that for us Jesus was born. Yes, I know technically He was born in June, and Christianity just co-opted a pagan holiday and called it the nativity of Christ, but regardless, I still feel the grace of God every Christmas season. I think it's because, no matter whether you celebrate for religious or secular reasons, Christmas is about love and thinking of others before yourself. Gifts are given out of kindness, almost everyone seems a little happier. It's a time to reflect on those in your life who make you happiest, to strengthen friendships both old and new. A time to show unlimited love to humankind simply because we're all human. We all bear heavy burdens, and it's up to each of us to lighten that load for those around us-- no one else will do it for us.
Frankly, I'm not a very good Christian, because I don't believe there is only one way to God (which of course, a Christian in the truest sense must believe that Heaven can only be reached through an acceptance of Jesus Christ). I don't think I'm wrong in my Christian beliefs, but I don't think that anyone who tries to reach for the divine can go about it in the wrong way, so long as they have good intentions. Certainly, religions contradict each other and you may say that these irreconcilable differences void one or another religion, but I think that God is an eternal, unlimited being, available to each of us. And I think all that we can do is try to make Earth a better place through our own actions and our love of each other. And in the end, isn't that what most religions are about? Love one another, forgive each other our trespasses, love God, embrace the divine in each and every human being. Only through our harmony with ourselves and each other can we really find God and create the peaceful world we dream of.
Maybe, to quote a Mumford and Sons song, "that's exactly how this grace thing works."
Last night was tree decorating night. With A Charlie Brown Christmas in the background and Sphinx asleep under the tree, we dragged out boxes and boxes of ornaments, all collected over many years. The finished product is eclectic; our tree has never been one of the perfect ones, with matching glass baubles and gold finishes. Instead it has everything from a paper hand-drawn creche scene ornament I made when I was five (you can imagine how classy that looks- ha!) to cross-stitched Santas to expensive glass balls and everything in-between.
After the tree is done, Christmas music goes on and I put up the Nativity scene. It's the most important task for me every year. I love unwrapping each figure: the three wise-men, with their gifts and their three camels; the shepherds in the fields by night, and the sheep they keep watch over, and even the drummer boy; the beautiful angel, who looks over all of them. But my favorite pieces are Joseph, the Virgin Mary, and, of course, the baby Jesus. I feel so reverent as I place them in the barn, with the cow who gave up her manger, and the donkey who carried Mary to Bethlehem. Those pieces glow with a special light.
I love all of the trappings of Christmas, presents and cards, holly boughs and mistletoe, candles and cookies-- but I love most of all remembering that for us Jesus was born. Yes, I know technically He was born in June, and Christianity just co-opted a pagan holiday and called it the nativity of Christ, but regardless, I still feel the grace of God every Christmas season. I think it's because, no matter whether you celebrate for religious or secular reasons, Christmas is about love and thinking of others before yourself. Gifts are given out of kindness, almost everyone seems a little happier. It's a time to reflect on those in your life who make you happiest, to strengthen friendships both old and new. A time to show unlimited love to humankind simply because we're all human. We all bear heavy burdens, and it's up to each of us to lighten that load for those around us-- no one else will do it for us.
Frankly, I'm not a very good Christian, because I don't believe there is only one way to God (which of course, a Christian in the truest sense must believe that Heaven can only be reached through an acceptance of Jesus Christ). I don't think I'm wrong in my Christian beliefs, but I don't think that anyone who tries to reach for the divine can go about it in the wrong way, so long as they have good intentions. Certainly, religions contradict each other and you may say that these irreconcilable differences void one or another religion, but I think that God is an eternal, unlimited being, available to each of us. And I think all that we can do is try to make Earth a better place through our own actions and our love of each other. And in the end, isn't that what most religions are about? Love one another, forgive each other our trespasses, love God, embrace the divine in each and every human being. Only through our harmony with ourselves and each other can we really find God and create the peaceful world we dream of.
Maybe, to quote a Mumford and Sons song, "that's exactly how this grace thing works."
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Sunshine and Snow
Yesterday was spent contentedly indoors, watching the falling snow and writing my thesis. I only got out in the morning to pay a visit to CW Rockefeller Library. As they will no longer let me check books out (WM borrowing privileges end during breaks), I took an hour or so yesterday to transcribe useful information from one of their research reports. Then back through the beautiful, soft snow to my cozy house where I wrote and wrote and wrote with a cup of tea and cinnamon apples. Sixteen pages in two days! And, once I correct the margins, those sixteen will instantly morph into at least nineteen (I'm weird, I like to have narrow margins to fit more on a page... it's the opposite of padding a paper, I suppose).
I'm realizing that right now I'm happier than ever; the past two days of intensely writing my thesis have been bliss. How I love getting lost in the eighteenth-century! I even read most of The Sylph the other night when I couldn't sleep, and now I can't put it down. As if such joy weren't enough, there are gifts abound! I've wrapped so many little boxes and bought so many treasures and even made a few. They are like pieces of delicate candy, beautiful and sweet, in piles on my table with ribbons and extra paper strewn everywhere and Christmas cards begging to be written, addressed, and sent.
Today all the snow has gone. The sun shines brightly, though the wind bites. I ventured out to mail some Christmas gifts and felt I would die of exposure walking through the parking lot. I think I preferred the clouds and snow, which is a big thing coming from me. Normally I crave the sunlight, but it's easier to hunker down with my books when the world is covered in white and lit with a soft grey. I almost can't wait for nighttime when the world will be lit in lamps and little sparkling Christmas lights.
I'm realizing that right now I'm happier than ever; the past two days of intensely writing my thesis have been bliss. How I love getting lost in the eighteenth-century! I even read most of The Sylph the other night when I couldn't sleep, and now I can't put it down. As if such joy weren't enough, there are gifts abound! I've wrapped so many little boxes and bought so many treasures and even made a few. They are like pieces of delicate candy, beautiful and sweet, in piles on my table with ribbons and extra paper strewn everywhere and Christmas cards begging to be written, addressed, and sent.
Today all the snow has gone. The sun shines brightly, though the wind bites. I ventured out to mail some Christmas gifts and felt I would die of exposure walking through the parking lot. I think I preferred the clouds and snow, which is a big thing coming from me. Normally I crave the sunlight, but it's easier to hunker down with my books when the world is covered in white and lit with a soft grey. I almost can't wait for nighttime when the world will be lit in lamps and little sparkling Christmas lights.
Sunday, December 12, 2010
A Discovery and a Holiday Party
I have discovered Harbour Coffee. I know it's been here in Williamsburg for a good long while now, but somehow I always manage to skip on past it in favor of Aroma's or the Daily Grind. Yesterday, though, my friend Megan and I decided to try somewhere new. She's back in town for Christmas (yay!) and neither of us wanted to face the hordes of people inundating Aroma's these days, and since campus hosted their Yule Log ceremony last night the Daily Grind seemed out, too. So we decided to try Harbour. I must say, I am delighted. I got a hot chocolate, and-- next to the Caffe Nero hot chocolate-- it might be the best I've had. Besides being rich and chocolately, I swear I could taste marshmallows in there. Will return for more... maybe even later today. Yum.
After a wonderful long time spent with Megan over hot chocolate and then in the cushy chairs at Barnes and Noble, I headed over to Anna's Holiday Party. Oh. My. Goodness. She had gone all out with the food-- FANTASTIC spanakopita, Swedish meatballs, crab cakes, and bacon-wrapped scallops. And it was so nice to see everyone. With our busy schedules and the fact that most of us don't have class anymore, I rarely see the other history graduate students. But Ben and Fio showed up, which made me so happy, and Lindsay, who I haven't seen in forever, and I even got to spend a lot of time talking to Karim about, well, my thesis, but she seemed so into it! I don't think I've ever enjoyed a history-student party more. Especially the bacon-wrapped scallops.
Then, Zan, Mike, and I started watching the new Doctor. So far... I like him. I love his companion, Amy, and she makes me want red hair so much (red hair has always been a secret dream of mine, since I first started idolizing Elizabeth I when I was 10). But he's... different from Tennant, but still very lovable. And still bad-ass. A madman with a box, if you will. Different but good. Maybe it portends how next year will end up.
Back to the thesising-- I got four more pages written last night!
After a wonderful long time spent with Megan over hot chocolate and then in the cushy chairs at Barnes and Noble, I headed over to Anna's Holiday Party. Oh. My. Goodness. She had gone all out with the food-- FANTASTIC spanakopita, Swedish meatballs, crab cakes, and bacon-wrapped scallops. And it was so nice to see everyone. With our busy schedules and the fact that most of us don't have class anymore, I rarely see the other history graduate students. But Ben and Fio showed up, which made me so happy, and Lindsay, who I haven't seen in forever, and I even got to spend a lot of time talking to Karim about, well, my thesis, but she seemed so into it! I don't think I've ever enjoyed a history-student party more. Especially the bacon-wrapped scallops.
Then, Zan, Mike, and I started watching the new Doctor. So far... I like him. I love his companion, Amy, and she makes me want red hair so much (red hair has always been a secret dream of mine, since I first started idolizing Elizabeth I when I was 10). But he's... different from Tennant, but still very lovable. And still bad-ass. A madman with a box, if you will. Different but good. Maybe it portends how next year will end up.
Back to the thesising-- I got four more pages written last night!
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Bath-Sick, Again
It all started a few nights ago when I had a dream that everyone in my study abroad program decided to take another three months abroad. For some reason, we all had the money and inclination, and wanted badly to recreate our experience so we packed up and arrived in Bath for a second semester abroad. I had arrived a few days early and was hanging out with my friend Andrew at his house in Prior Park, which for some reason was on the ocean. Then Shea called and said she was almost to Nunes, so I left and walked around the town for awhile-- it looked just as Bath had always looked, and I thought, "I love that I still know my way around; here I am at the top of Milsom!" I woke up just as I unlocked the door to Nunes, where I would climb the 63 steps up to Flat 5. Now, I can't get Bath out of my head. I miss the place and the people terribly. I miss my flat and flatmates; I miss heading out to a pub. I miss Waitrose, and Opa. I miss passing Po Na Na on my way home, and I miss that at the intersections I needed to look the opposite directions. I miss the towpath. I miss our week in residence at Oxford and the covered market there. I miss my tutors and my friends. I even miss the food trucks that came out at night.
It probably doesn't help that I listen to BBC Radio 1 so often. Today, a man said he was at a pub having a shandy and I remembered my one experience with a shandy after my nine mile Dorset hike. I really should have had water. Then I spent some time on the ASE website, looking a pictures and reading class descriptions. And the other day I saw my friend Beth, who spent the last semester in France, and had just arrived in from London. Oh, London.
I think I'm also a little, well, bored in Williamsburg. I have plenty to do, that's for sure, but I'm tired of telling people about my thesis and about my microfilm. Those things are dynamic for me, but not exactly thrilling and certainly not the subject of fascinating conversation, unless I happen to be speaking with someone else who adores the 18th century. Usually those topics last about 10 seconds before the other person is done. Sigh. And so, Bath.
Lots is happening, though. Last night Zan and I finished Little Women (which always makes me cry), the other day I had a mini-party and we all watched Muppet Christmas Carol, I've begun fashioning clay figures, I have had coffee with many friends over the past five days, I have almost finished going through the Prince William County records, and I managed to get the book I most need for my thesis through ILL since CW cut off borrowing privileges. Gifts have been purchased, cards are ready to be written, decorations have gone up, and Christmas feels joyful. Everything is on track. But right now, I feel like I'm in a holding pattern, waiting for the next thing to happen. Perhaps once the thesis is done I'll feel like I can really take off, really find out what the world has in store.
It probably doesn't help that I listen to BBC Radio 1 so often. Today, a man said he was at a pub having a shandy and I remembered my one experience with a shandy after my nine mile Dorset hike. I really should have had water. Then I spent some time on the ASE website, looking a pictures and reading class descriptions. And the other day I saw my friend Beth, who spent the last semester in France, and had just arrived in from London. Oh, London.
I think I'm also a little, well, bored in Williamsburg. I have plenty to do, that's for sure, but I'm tired of telling people about my thesis and about my microfilm. Those things are dynamic for me, but not exactly thrilling and certainly not the subject of fascinating conversation, unless I happen to be speaking with someone else who adores the 18th century. Usually those topics last about 10 seconds before the other person is done. Sigh. And so, Bath.
Lots is happening, though. Last night Zan and I finished Little Women (which always makes me cry), the other day I had a mini-party and we all watched Muppet Christmas Carol, I've begun fashioning clay figures, I have had coffee with many friends over the past five days, I have almost finished going through the Prince William County records, and I managed to get the book I most need for my thesis through ILL since CW cut off borrowing privileges. Gifts have been purchased, cards are ready to be written, decorations have gone up, and Christmas feels joyful. Everything is on track. But right now, I feel like I'm in a holding pattern, waiting for the next thing to happen. Perhaps once the thesis is done I'll feel like I can really take off, really find out what the world has in store.
Sunday, December 5, 2010
First Snow
It snowed last night!-- ever so briefly and lightly, and most of it has disappeared this morning. A little still clung to the branches of trees when I looked out the window just after sunrise, but I think it has gone by now. For once, I didn't expect it. Most winters of my life I compulsively check the weather forecasts when the temperature drops, waiting impatiently to see snow predicted. Last night, I stepped outside with Zan when without warning tiny, perfect flakes fell onto our faces and our coats. It felt like magic. There wasn't enough snow to walk in, to hear that woolen-crunch sound and to walk in each others footsteps to keep from disturbing the field of white, but even so when I got out of my car alone last night and began towards the house, the silence had that snow quality to it. The absolute silence of snow, how every sound seems softened, muted. It feels peaceful.
Peace would be good right now. I've worked myself into a bit of a tizzy the past week. I want to work on Christmas gifts (and I want them to be the perfect gifts-- I take great joy in finding/creating the perfect gifts), I want to work on my thesis, and I need to get up to Richmond to read a few more reels of microfilm. And last night I got a flat tire, so there's that to deal with, too. I think I'm done with applications for now, so that's helpful, but I find that I'm sleeping poorly at night, tossing and turning, waking up in a cold sweat, and then waking up for good about an hour before my alarm, unable to fall back asleep. I would take afternoon naps, but I don't feel like I have time. I think I've unnecessarily put a lot of pressure on this holiday season to be perfect, and I realize it's only in my mind, so I'm trying to take a breath and let it go... but with everything else going on, it's difficult.
I'm very full of thoughts and I wish to quiet them long enough to enjoy the season. Perhaps a little more snow would do the trick.
Peace would be good right now. I've worked myself into a bit of a tizzy the past week. I want to work on Christmas gifts (and I want them to be the perfect gifts-- I take great joy in finding/creating the perfect gifts), I want to work on my thesis, and I need to get up to Richmond to read a few more reels of microfilm. And last night I got a flat tire, so there's that to deal with, too. I think I'm done with applications for now, so that's helpful, but I find that I'm sleeping poorly at night, tossing and turning, waking up in a cold sweat, and then waking up for good about an hour before my alarm, unable to fall back asleep. I would take afternoon naps, but I don't feel like I have time. I think I've unnecessarily put a lot of pressure on this holiday season to be perfect, and I realize it's only in my mind, so I'm trying to take a breath and let it go... but with everything else going on, it's difficult.
I'm very full of thoughts and I wish to quiet them long enough to enjoy the season. Perhaps a little more snow would do the trick.
Friday, December 3, 2010
For We Need a Little Christmas
I have a fireplace with a mantle this year. Clearly, it begged for stockings.
And so it was that last night, after watching a good chunk of The Santa Clause-- because who doesn't love Bernard?-- I found myself in Target buying stocking hangers, lighted garland, and gift tags. Last night also found me in the storage closet of my house, dragging out the Santa plate, the Santa fireplace screen, the (Christmas)tree hugging bear, and some tinsel garland. And the stockings, of course. The place is beginning to look quite festive, if I do say so myself. Zan and I topped everything off with a bowl of stove-popped popcorn and the first half of the movie Little Women, which he had never seen (and still doesn't know the end of, so no spoilers please). Yes, it's girly, but I pointed out that at least now he gets the reference in the Forest Temple in Zelda: Ocarina of Time-- the four Po sisters names are Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy. Yes, I brought that up because unless you got the joke in the first place that detail is probably something unmemorable. I'm such a nerd.
On another note, tomorrow is my grandpa's 90th birthday!!! Happy birthday, Dzadek!
Today: Christmas shopping/gift-making. Then thesis.
(Photo found here)
And so it was that last night, after watching a good chunk of The Santa Clause-- because who doesn't love Bernard?-- I found myself in Target buying stocking hangers, lighted garland, and gift tags. Last night also found me in the storage closet of my house, dragging out the Santa plate, the Santa fireplace screen, the (Christmas)tree hugging bear, and some tinsel garland. And the stockings, of course. The place is beginning to look quite festive, if I do say so myself. Zan and I topped everything off with a bowl of stove-popped popcorn and the first half of the movie Little Women, which he had never seen (and still doesn't know the end of, so no spoilers please). Yes, it's girly, but I pointed out that at least now he gets the reference in the Forest Temple in Zelda: Ocarina of Time-- the four Po sisters names are Meg, Jo, Beth, and Amy. Yes, I brought that up because unless you got the joke in the first place that detail is probably something unmemorable. I'm such a nerd.
On another note, tomorrow is my grandpa's 90th birthday!!! Happy birthday, Dzadek!
Today: Christmas shopping/gift-making. Then thesis.
(Photo found here)
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