Closing January

January is ending with mild acute thesis panic (as, I imagine, the next few months will).  I keep writing and writing, but it never feels good enough.  I'm having a hard-hitting case of imposter syndrome.  I know it's my adviser's job to, well, advise, and offer suggestions, but it doesn't make it easier to hear that parts of what I've written need to go back to the drawing board-- even if I kind of felt that these parts did when I first wrote them.  Especially with so little time left to complete this rather large writing project.  I want to just force him to accept what I've written even if parts don't quite make sense or some historical fact is a little gratuitous because it makes the word count longer!  And I want that right now!  And it seems so easy when he says it: "Just write what you think."  But what if what I think isn't good enough?  What if... well, what if.  Anyone else feel this way?

On a brighter note, today I finished The Mysteries of Udolpho for class.  What an incredibly long book!  I feel so accomplished having actually completed it!  And, it has set my mind in motion for some future schemes (that no, don't involve black veils, kidnapping, murder, or a trip to the Pyrenees)!